Guys will be Guys

Ray Rice is a steaming dumpster fire full of raccoon carcasses, used diapers, and student loan receipts. The worst kind of things.

While many have focused on tearing down Rice (deservedly so), not many have discussed the social impact it has on male perception. The media traditionally portrays men as lazy, incoherent, self-centered slobs whose sole purpose is to go to work and support a family. Ray Rice’s actions have furthered the stereotype that we are all also male-chauvinistic pigs who treat women like objects with no regard for feelings, actions, or repercussions that might ensue. We are stone cold killers. I’m here to tell you we are not…

I’d like to break down some of the “oh so common” stereotypes that plague our gender and the media likes to portray:

We don’t care and we don’t listen. I’ll give you the part with ‘selective hearing.’ While we don’t always listen to everything, we definitely hear it. Guys don’t like to hear things that take them out of their comfort zone. To be honest, girls don’t like it either. I can tell you that we DO care what women have to say and we DO listen to a lot. We legitimately feel guilty if something you told us doesn’t stick or resonate in our heads. If we forget something you told us or a special occasion, it’s not because we didn’t listen, it’s just that we have a lot of other things our ‘fight or flight’ minds that keeps us distracted.

We are always thinking about sex. I, personally, hate this one more than all others. This one hurts guys a lot, especially when trying to get to know someone new. The first thing we do when talking to a woman, admittedly, is to see if we are physically attracted to them. Same goes for women. It’s human nature. After that, I would tell you that the majority of guys don’t go straight to thinking about sex. If we’ve determined a female is physically attractive, we don’t want to blow it by bringing up sex! That’s so counter-intuitive. We want to get to know whether or not she is going to have the same interest in us as we do in her. That’s how a meaningful relationship develops.

We are emotionless, stone cold, killers. This is a lie. As much as “the dudes” would never talk about it, we have some serious feelings ladies. If you’ve ever been in a long, committed relationship, you know that your guy can level with you deep down, even if it’s every once in a while. We simply don’t like doing it out of (mainly) social pressure of it not being a “macho” thing to do. When we get rejected, it hurts. When we lose, it hurts. When someone lies to us, it hurts. When we get a paper cut, it hurts. When we lose the remote under the couch, it hurts. We are trained to internalize our emotions and we know it’s not a “turn on” to women unless you are confident and positive.

I could go on and on, but I’ll stop here to keep this short and readable on the toilet. The bottom line is, it’s guys like Ray Rice that allow the media to feast and push these stereotypes in our faces while most of it simply is not true. I’m here to tell you that guys like Rice, Peterson, Michael Vick, and so on and so forth, are NOT the norm. These are the extremes. The ones that make for a good (or bad I guess?) story. Men should not have to apologize or suffer for the actions of dumpster-fire’s like these guys. Media likes to talk about controversial topics that get them ratings and viewership. Keep this in perspective next time you hear about a MINORITY committing an extreme crime against us, the MAJORITY.

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